


Ketchup, Mayonnaise, Pepper, and Salt (ft. Ggul)

by rome_in_asia



Category: K-pop, The Boyz (Korea Band)
Genre: A pig, Canon Compliant, Crack, Fluff, Fluff and Crack, I just needed some The Boyz Crack please, Kittens, Living Together, M/M, Pets, Precious, The Author Regrets Nothing, non-au
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-10
Updated: 2018-06-10
Packaged: 2019-05-20 14:35:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,924
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14896394
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rome_in_asia/pseuds/rome_in_asia
Summary: PROMPT: Hwall and Hyunjae sneak kittens into the dorm and chaos is let loose.





	Ketchup, Mayonnaise, Pepper, and Salt (ft. Ggul)

  
Hyunjae knew it was a bad idea.

But when you have Hwall pouting adorably with the entire carton in his arms, about to cry in the middle of the street with his beret lightly tilted off to one side and the street lamp making him look like a very fashionable, chic angel at nine in evening while walking back from practice, you can't really say no.

"Just put them there, near the heater." Hyunjae silently prayed no one was awake. He needed sleep to deal with what he supposed will be a meltdown when the other members find out.

Hwall piled several blankets on the carton, smiling ever so brightly. "Thanks for letting me do this, hyung! You're the best, but don't tell Sangyeon-hyung because he sulks easily." Then skipped off to his room (quietly, because Kevin is a light sleeper and Changmin is just sensitive _period_ ), shooting Hyunjae with an imaginary bow and arrow before closing the door.

"That kid will be the death of me." He muttered, making sure the box is warm then walking towards his own room. Unsurprisingly, Haknyeon was already snoring in his bed, the pink piggy nightlight casting the room in a soft color of sleep.

What was surprising though, was Sunwoo's black hair and neon yellow socks poking out from the blankets of Haknyeon's bed.

Hyunjae decided to just not question that.

(But he did take a picture.)

 

* * *

 

 

"'Morning." Younghoon yawned, half-falling off his chair. It wasn't really morning anymore, but past one in the afternoon, but they had a free day and teenage boys always sleep until midday if they could. Kevin was trying to crack an egg into a frying pan, frowning sleepily as it wouldn't crack.

"Hyung, that's hardboiled." Chanhee stepped in, hair a wild mess and a blanket crease indented on his cheek. He gently took the egg and replaced it with a raw one, taking the hardboiled egg to the table to peel the shell off and feed Eric, who had his head on the table and already drifted off two minutes ago.

Jacob walked in, already showered and awake and smelling like skin care, carrying one of his cereal boxes. "Good morning, everyone!" He chirped, sitting next to a dead-to-the-world Eric and ignoring Younghoon's grunt of acknowledgement.

"How did you get Eric out of bed?" Juyeon wandered in, glasses dangerously close to falling off his nose as he opened the fridge to get a carton of milk.

"You wonder why his face is wet?" Chanhee asked with a moutful of bread.

"You're a barbarian." Jacob laughed, making Kevin complain that it was too early to be happy, then opened his cereal box... and promptly fell of his chair. " _What the actual fork is that?_ " He yelled in English, launching himself far away from his box of Fruit Loops.

Younghoon, startled awake from the yelling, gingerly picked up the box from the edge of the table.

A small, furry worm was poking and _moving_.

"What the heck?"

"Get it away!" Jacob screamed.

"Hyung, wait, calm down." Juyeon took the box that Younghoon gingerly put down again and tore off the top half like the Hulk incarnate. "Oh dear."

Kevin carefully set the batch of fried eggs away from the stove. "Is that a cat?"

" _A cat in my cereal box?_ "

"A cat?" Maybe it was just because Chanhee just woke up, so it took his brilliant mind a few moments to process, but when it did, he started screaming too. "I'm allergic!"

"What the heck is going on here? Why is everybody screaming?" Sangyeon stomped (not really, but he kinda had to stomp because he was wearing his onesie) into the kitchen with Changmin and Hyunjae in tow, also still in pajamas. "Jacob, are you okay? Why are you on the floor?"

"Is that a cat?" Changmin squealed, diving straight for the (albeit also confused) kitten still stuck in the cereal box. He gently removed the poor thing from the carton and started playing with it, cooing and talking in baby language to the kitten.

Hyunjae gulped.

_How did it get out of the box?_

He started to sweat nervously.

_Wait... weren't there four of them yesterday?_

"Good morning!"

Hwall strutted in, bright grin and all, carrying a kitten in each hand. He proudly stood in front of a confused Sangyeon and a traumatized Jacob, proclaiming, "It was getting really cold outside and these fellas would have died, hyungs! I brought four of them in last night! Can we keep them? Oh, and I named the kitties. This is Ketchup and this is Mayonnaise."

There was a long stretch of silence before Chanhee asked in a tiny, tiny voice: "You named them after condiments?"

"Wait, I don't think that's the issue here." Kevin ran a hand through his messy hair.

"Yeah, why is Eric still sleeping through all of this?" Younghoon shot the maknae a glare, poking his arm with a wooden chopstick. "Chanhee, did he fall asleep past three again?"

"That's not the issue!" Jacob wailed, gesturing wildly at the three kittens. "What are these?"

"Baby cats?" Changmin answered, caressing the grey furball in his arms.

Hwall gave the kitty a soft smile. "I call that one Pepper."

"It fits it." Changmin and Hwall shared a giggle and okay maybe Younghoon and Hyunjae's hearts melted a little. They were that vulnerable, yes.

"Hwallie, why the heck did you bring these kittens home?" Sangyeon tried to sort out the mess, like the responsible leader he is. Kevin moved to take Ketchup from Hwall, and

Chanhee ran all the way back to his room to retrieve a face mask and gloves.

"I already said why, hyung."

Then Jacob turned to Hyunjae, eyebrows knit together in accusation. "Weren't you with Hwall last night? You told us to go ahead because you were going to teach him the choreo he missed. Did you or did you not let Hyunjoon bring an entire litter here?"

"I can't say I didn't _not_ try to stop him." Hyunjae evaded.

"Is he trying to confuse me with twisting Korean words like that? Because it's working." Jacob asked Sangyeon, who looked like he really had no idea what to do.

Then Sunwoo walked in with a fluffy towel in his arms and the biggest, softest smile on his face.

"Well, someone slept well." Hyunjae noted.

"Sunwoo's carrying Salt." Hwall announced, excitedly putting the kittens together in Jacob's cereal box. "Say hello to each other, kitties. Sunwoo-yah, bring Salt over here so he can meet Ketchup, Mayonnaise, and Pepper!"

"You named them after condiments?" Sunwoo choked out, placing the white kitten on the box. "That's beautiful." he whispered afterwards.

Sangyeon shook his head. "I think I gotta lay down for a moment."

 

* * *

 

 

An hour later, all twelve sat in the living room, the kittens too. Ketchup was in Kevin's arms, Mayonnaise was with Hwall, Pepper was with Changmin and Younghoon, and Salt was with Sunwoo. Haknyeon was complaining everyone's ears off with how he wasn't allowed to pring his pet pig Ggul to the dorm but _how come Hwall can adopt four kittens all at once huh?_

Taking a deep breath, Sangyeon let his verdict out. "We can't keep them."

" _WHAT_?" 

Sunwoo cradled Salt to his neck, looking so betrayed. "H-how could you say such a despicable thing, hyung? How can you?!"

"And right in front of the babies!" Younghoon yelled.

"Babies?" Juyeon asked, confused.

"The kitties."

"Ah."

Jacob took over, trying his best to explain gently. "Kittens need a lot of care, Sunwoo. We're not always at the dorm because of schedules, so who's gonna feed them? Who's gonna take care of them? Who's gonna clean up their poop?"

"Eric can clean their poop." Changmin suggested brightly.

"Hey!" The maknae complained, still grouchy after being awokened the second time and then forced to clean after Mayonnaise's mess in the bathroom right after. When he realized they were talking about keeping the kittens though, Eric suddenly took it all back in. "I mean, _YES_. Hyung, please keep the cats, please!"

"We already have a pet though..." Juyeon started slowly. "Remember Park Saengsok [ _lit: fish in Korean_ ]?"

"It has a name?" Haknyeon asked disbelievingly.

Sangyeon sighed. "Guys, I'm really sorry but we can't keep your cats. We'll drop them off at the shelter later to make sure they get to great homes, alright? Then you can visit them whenever you can until they get adopted."

Hwall and Sunwoo had already started crying even before Sangyeon could finish.

Kevin was hugging Ketchup, whispering words of comfort to the kitten. Chanhee could only look at the older boy in despair, and braving his allergies, reached out a hand to rub Kevin's back comfortingly. "It's okay, hyung. It's okay."

"Maybe if we hide Pepper in your shoebox, Sangyeon-hyung won't find him and take him to the shelter!" Changmin whispered, desperate to keep the adorable grey furball that was rubbing against Younghoon's cheek. "Do you think Sangyeon-hyung will notice?"

"Probably not, but Jacob-hyung will." Younghoon sighed sadly. "I don't want Pepper to go."

"Hwall, let Mayonnaise go." Hyunjae said softly to the younger boy, who resolutely shook his head no. Hyunjae's heart broke at the sight, and he gently held onto Hwall's shoulders. "Hwall, come on. We aren't at the dorm all the time to care for Mayo and her siblings. What if they starve to death while we're on tour in Asia?"

"Hey, that's kinda harsh." Juyeon hissed. Eric stifled a giggle at the glaring contest that ensued between the two visuals.

"I don't butter my toast in the morning, Juyeon, bite me." Hyunjae snapped, then turned back to Hwall with a sweet, gentle voice-- a complete 360 with how he was with Juyeon. "Let's go with Sangyeon-hyung to the shelter later, okay? So you can say goodbye properly. Promise I won't tell them if you cried there too."

When Hwall finally nodded and let Hyunjae hold Mayonnaise as he went to the bathroom to freshen up after crying and wash his face.

"Someone help me!" Haknyeon mouthed to his hyungs, struggling with a sobbing Sunwoo clutching Salt. He was wrapping the younger boy in a koala hug, but Sunwoo was stil stroking Salt's fur and weeping like he was in a soap opera.

"Have fun." Chanhee winked at him, still comforting Kevin.

"We'll drop by the shelter in an hour, then." Sangyeon decided, squeezing Jacob's hand as a thank you for doing the terrible deed of taking their childen's pets away not even a day after arrival and breaking emotional soul bonds. "Those who wanna come better shower now or they'll be left behind."

 

* * *

 

 

Needless to say, the noonas at the shelter were shocked to see 12 handsome boys with four of them quietly crying as they turned small kittens over.

That night, the dorm was quiet.

Until Chanhee screamed in the bathroom.

Kevin rushed in, eyes wide in alarm and Sunwoo, face still puffy from crying, in tow carrying a baseball bat. They found Chanhee half-done with brushing his teeth, pointing at the tub with a face as white as a sheet mask.

Slowly, very slowly, Sunwoo pulled the curtain to one side.

"Oh, you found Ggul!" Haknyeon was suddenly at the door, smile wide and eyes half-crescents.

"Y-you mean-" Kevin was holding a shaking Chanhee in his arms, jaw agape. "That's _yours_?"

Haknyeon pushed past them and held the small, pink piglet in his arms. Turning to his speechless boyfriend still holding the baseball bat, Haknyeon smiled. "Sunwoo-yah, say hello to Ggul!"

**Author's Note:**

> *unbeta'ed, will proof read when i remember lmao
> 
>  
> 
> [okay i was trying to make this as accurate as i could so a note: Chanhee's not allergic, it's actually Kevin and this fact came in too late for me since i already wrote the fic ahhhhh]
> 
>  
> 
> that went well (i hope) HELLO I've actually been stanning the boys for some time now and I JUST NEED A FAN FIC PLEASE 
> 
> this is my first contribution to the fandom and i hope it's not the last kjsdksdhshsd i need moar of this
> 
> anyway, how was it? i hope you enjoyed reading!
> 
> twitter: [@.juyeonieee]
> 
> thank you for reading, have a nice day :>


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